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Sharon Mesmer is on the short list for the next Brooklyn Poet Laureate to succeed Ken Siegelman.

It really isn’t a contest is it? She has to get the nod.

In a story Gene Kuntzman did for the The Brooklyn Paper he wrote:

“Mesmer will get the vote of anyone who likes a randy dame who’s not afraid to write poems with titles like “Annoying Diabetic Bitch” and “Holy Mother of Monkey Poo.” “If anyone is suggesting me [as poet laureate], it must be because I slept around so much,” she said. But she’s being modest: Mesmer, who studied under Allen Ginsberg, teaches at the New School and, this fall, at Brooklyn College. She’s published three books of poetry and would love to do outreach to students. “I’ll go into any school that doesn’t have a restraining order,” she said. Mesmer is part of the Brooklyn-based Flarf Collective, whose members sometimes craft poems out of Google search results (hence “Annoying Diabetic Bitch” and her master work, “Juan Valdez Has a Little Juan Valdez (i.e., Energy Cannon) in His Pants”). “I put ‘Juan Valdez’ and ‘energy cannon’ in Google and wrote a whole poem off the results,” she said. “It shows how much fun poetry can be.” She said she has been writing poetry since she was 14. “I’m almost 50 now, so you do the math. No really, you should. I’m a poet, I can’t do math.”

Don’t worry Sharon. I’ll do the math for you.

In another piece The Brooklyn Paper said her liability in the selection process (there’s a process?) was that she …

“Is liable to mention her sexual history. And she has a poem titled, “Holy Mother of Monkey Poo.”

Me? I’m think’n this is a good thing.

But if you really want to know how wonderful this poet is, check out this video of her reading Annoying Diabetic Bitch.

Sharon Mesmer: A great teacher, a great mentor, a living legend, a wonderful friend, and the best darn flarf poet around.

I mean, did you see any other flarf poets around today when you went to get lunch?

GO SHARON! GO!

Full disclosure: I am indebted to Mesmer because she didn’t throw me out of her class, even though I gave ample cause, over and over.

And check out her site, Virgin Formica.